That’s no cacophony when the wild ducks you’ve been herding line up on your skillfully built wall and joyfully quack to the same song sheet. It is coherent and magical.
Serendipity is not coherence. It’s not only the right time, location, or place. It takes bravery, constancy, focus, and clarity of goal for it to happen.
That’s a long list of qualities, but if you won’t acknowledge that each one is present in every successful person you admire, I’ll shoot* one of those ducks. Not “I simply got fortunate,” “it was nothing,” or “I’m just super-talented, fantastic, and what else would you expect,” but rather difficult, occasionally stomach-churning endurance.
Throwing a few dice in the air and praying they all land on sixes won’t lead us to coherence. We get there because we’ve enlisted assistance to dig deep, figure out why we act the way we do, had a strategy to go from point A to point Z, the patience to see it through, and had the faith in ourselves to stick at it.
Coherence does not deliver prosperity by flash and beauty. It’s not a mansion with a view of the ocean and Disneyland. NOT The Secret, however. It has to do with living in a state of abundance, when enough for you and the people you care about is just enough. Read Daring Greatly by Brene Brown; she does a good job of telling this tale.
when a direction is in error
Once, we hired really poorly and failed to terminate employees quickly enough. When he was finished with us, our ducks were shot out of the sky and fell to the ground, bleeding and torn.
The problem is this. The poor beasts were already worn out before we recruited him. They had been thrashing around in the air in an attempt to land on the wall, but we kept shifting the coordinates. We were led astray by our course. We had the same fate as the ducks.
We didn’t pay attention.
We weren’t paying attention to our clients. They weren’t even listening to us since we were speaking from a place of agony if we were communicating at all. Deep, focused listening simply cannot take place while you are exhausted.
We started over from scratch. We now need a fresh flock of ducks as well as the reconstruction of our wall. However, in order to achieve that, we had to evaluate our shortcomings.
Everyone has heard the adage that you cannot succeed unless you have failed. Depending on the severity of the failure, that lesson is difficult. You may also think of failure as a stepping stone to success.
Examine and recreate
We pondered those pathetic little corpses for a while. After that, we buried them and focused much more on recognizing the worth of what we had to offer, who it was for, and how to make it materialize in a way that was useful.
Empathy. a wonderful item
One day, I discovered a wonderful thing. It was the idea that it was extremely impolite to discuss your offer with anyone in any context until you had a thorough knowledge of their most pressing problems. The notion got me by the throat since I’m not rude.
This involved more than just carefully listening and asking the appropriate questions. It has to do with empathy. the capacity to fully comprehend the requirements and emotions of another.
Was this supposed to be a pious exercise? Was it possible to empathize with folks whose comprehension of your services—their breadth, their intention, their results, and their cost—was so discordant that you may as well have been speaking in a Swahili dialect. No, obviously, unless your halo was big and shiny.
Then, in order for empathy to be utilized, something had to drastically shift. Alignment was what altered.
It all began with a thorough exercise to choose the people I should collaborate with the most. So that they and I could both recognize when it was a good fit, there needed to be a filtering procedure. I investigated each potential problem that a business owner who was a good fit would experience, treating each one as if it were priceless. as it stood.
Was my answer the right one? Would that be consistent with the underlying premise in my offer? That a business owner may use the convergence of their intellect, heart, and the web as a tremendous source of inspiration to grow their company and improve the lives of others?
After that, it received a tick and entered the coaching program. So it developed. The wall came with it.
it’s over (or nearly)
While several of my ducks are landing and even competing for position, some are still flapping around.
What I’ve learned is that coherence follows alignment. A distinct manner of being with coherence.
You collaborate with individuals that you naturally empathize with, admire greatly, and want to succeed. They respect you in return, look forward to your company, and unsurprisingly, you speak the same language.
The coherence of seven gradual steps
1. Enroll in classes that emphasize focus and direction. Hire a coach. Actually, this deep dive is painful and might use some support.
2. Consistently brainstorm (rules of a brainstorm here). Add the outcomes to the mixture. Cross-check one thing with another.
3. What do you want? Ask “why” often, just like a toddler. Exploration and discovery are the results of curiosity.
4. Which customer is your ideal one? This is a developing project. Read your reviews; they include helpful hints.
5. Think about even the tiniest problem that your potential client could have. Consult them first. Add it in if your proposal doesn’t resolve the issue.
6. Acknowledge that getting your ducks in a row requires persistence and patience. even years. However, today won’t be repeated, so take pleasure in the journey.
Blog about it. Blogging clarifies if you’re certain or uncertain. And it strengthens your clan. (Consider a passionate, devoted business family.)